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Hi  again.  Here are some more paragrahphs.   I will keep working on it. Your dad is  welcomed to complain if  he thinks I am changing the meanings of his statements.   My goal  here is to be sure I am using his ideas and words and expressing  them so  those who read it in English will understand what he meant.

Introduction
 
Korea  is a small  peninsula of about 10 million [ha.] I  assume here you  mean hectare, which is equal to 10,000 square  meters per hectare this is  acceptable and probably most correct  in a scientific or technical or  professional book.  You might want to add  here] (one  hectare is equal  to 2.47 U.S. acres.) or 24.7  million  acres.   [Or  you might not  want to add that. I get an idea that you got this  Introduction info from a book  or an on line site. It depends on  who you intend to have as an audience.  If it is going to be technical and scientific  individuals  then what you have is probably fine. ] Her total population  reaches  to 47.3 million. Population [intensity]I  think you want density here. is  very high as 4.8  people per hectare. The land [is  consisted] consists of  about 65%  mountains, 20% cultural [? Do you mean  agricultural  area?  Or Do you mean that  there is 65% mountains where no one could possibly live and 20%  inhabitable area  ( places where someone could live if they wanted  to) The word cultural here  confuses me.)  area and 15% others.   Do you mean above that ‘The amount of land  available  for crops is limited to about 20% of the total land in Korea.”  Or  “Only 20% or the land mass in Korea is tillable.  Tillable means ‘it can be tilled’ which means  it can be farmed or ‘crops can be grown on it.’  From the next paragraph I get the idea that this  is true. 
 
[Because  of these  reasons, the] For these  reasons high  agricultural  productivity is very
For these reasons  high agricultural productivity is very  necessary  and important to meet
 
necessary and  important [for meeting  people's] to meet the nations  demands  for food.
 
[ food  demand.] 
the nations  demands for  food.
 
For these reasons high  agricultural  productivity is very necessary and important to meet the nations  demands for food.
 
 
A seed is [  add ] the basis  of  agriculture. Therefore without a good
 
seed, it is difficult  to  expect success in agriculture. [ The issue of ‘A  seed’  which can be used here or ‘Seed’ with out the indefinite article  ‘A’ (The  not definite (specific) article) comes up here.  You May want to say]  Seed is the basis of  agriculture,  without good seed it is difficult to expect success in  agriculture.  That is why most [of ]Take of  out countries [have  been doing their  best for] are working  hard[developing their] to develop their seed  industry.   Do  you mean most of the countries in Asia,  or most countries in the  world or the developing world are doing their best  developing  their seed industry?
 
Seed is the basis of  agriculture,  without good seed it is difficult to expect success in  agriculture.  That is why most countries  are  working hard to develop their seed industry.
 
Or
A seed it the base of  all agriculture.  Without a good seed it  is  difficult to have successful agriculture. This is why many countries  are  working hard to develop good high yielding seeds.
 
[ Add  ]The Korean government has [also] omit  also here  unless it refers to the idea that other countries are  developing their seed  production and Korea is also doing that]  been driving  the policies for building her  seed industry such as breeding [a] take  out the a  new [variety,] varieties,  protecting breeder's rights,  supplying  consumers and germplasm users [ I do not know this  word  or term ‘germplasm users’] Do you mean planters?  As in those who plant seeds.  (farmers) or do you mean something else. The  word  or term germplasm is not in a common English dictionary and the  term  germplasm users is not there either. The term ‘germ plasm’  is in the Merriam  Webster’s dictionary that is the same dictionary  I gave to your son as a  gift.  It is the best dictionary for the  American English Language  to use for any sort of scholarly or professional  use.  It is the oldest American  dictionary published  and has the most research to back up its words and  meanings.  That dictionary defines the  term in relation to germ cells as in ‘genetic issues.’ It  says it is part of the  cells bearing the genetic information  or  is the hereditary material  of the cells.  I am supposing  from this that you might be talking about supplying  consumers  ( meaning farmers with some sort of seed that gets them started  or  going in the agricultural business.  Perhaps you mean something that I as a lay person  (a lay person is  someone who is not familiar with a particular  subject or profession)  would  not be likely to know about.  If it is a modern term in the seed industry  please tell  me what the term means in simple words and I will try to help you  find a word in common English or a phrase that will let the readers  know what  you mean. with a high qualified  and certified  seed.    [Now  I am thinking  that germplasm means farmers. ]
Among  these policies  and situations, this book is focused on production  and distribution of 5 major  crops' seed in Korea. [ Crops’  with the  apostrophe the ‘ at the end means possessive that the  seed belongs to or comes  form the crops With the word crop referring  to more than one crop.  This  is correct here since there are 5 crops  being spoken of.  I am not certain but I  think  you want the phrase ‘ seed crops’ here. I will research this  and let you  know.  Do  you mean crops that are raised  especially to make seeds from?] The5 major food crops  are  rice, barley, soybean, corn(maize) and potato. Among these crops,  rice [occupies] comprises or makes  up about 90% of total  production  amounts of food crops. The average annual production of rice reaches  to 6 million MT. [ I do not know the  abbreviation  MT. ]
The  yield of rice per  ha is about 5MT. It is, I think, a very  high yield. This  high yield per unit area is due to:  [increments of or better] increase  in the  distributed  amounts [better  yet] increase  inthe distribution of  a high  qualified-certified seed, development & spread of cultivation  technology and  better irrigation/drainage facilities of paddy  field. [Because I am not  familiar with this industry,  I am not sure, but it seams to me this should say] paddy  fields. [However, it may be  the case that the use  of the singular term here is acceptable.  It may be a tradition in this industry to  refer  to this in the singular in a discussion such as this. ][The] take  out the word  The and the s’ at the end of crops’ and capitalize  Crop crops' cultivation  such as sowing, planting,  weeding and harvesting is almost [ add ] all done  by a  machine.  Crop  cultivation  activity such as sowing, planting, weeding and harvesting  is almost all done by  a machine.
 
 
As  shown in the or by  the above  table, the cultivated area [ of]for each of  our 5 major crops trends  to decrease [, on  contrast,] while yield  per unit area  trends to increase or maintain [take  out the]a similar level. [Specially] Especially  theor Specifically  theyield  per unit of  rice and potato [on] in 2003 was increased [take  out around] from 160 to [Take  out and ]200% each, compared  with  that o[n] f {you should have in  1980. or of  1980.] 1980.
As shown  by the above  table, the cultivated area for each of our 5 major  crops trends to decrease over time while yield per unit area trends to increase  or maintain a similar level.  Specifically, the yield per unit  of rice and potato in 2003 was increased from  160 to 200% each,  compared with that of 1980.

The certified  seed  production and distribution activity, I think, has played an important  role [for an increment of  the] in increasing agricultural  productivity.
 
In addition to food  crops, [the crops  of] vegetable[s] and fruit[s]corps are  important in view  of our national  economy.  They[and] occupy  most of the cultivated crop area [of crops ] as  a matter of fact.  The amount of cultivated  area [of]for crops in Korea is from largest in order of  vegetables,  fruit crops, special crops including oil crops and flowering plants. ([Because of] For this  reason, the  economic weight of the seed industry by  crops  is great in order of the similar as order of crops' cultivated area.  I am not sure what  you  are trying to say here.  Are  you  saying?  The importance  given to  improving vegetable seeds by the government and seed  industry is more than the  importance given to improving flowering  plants seeds because more acres are  planted with vegetables than  are planted with flowering seeds?  Is that what you are saying or mean?  )
 
In addition to food  crops,  vegetable and fruit corps are important in view of our national  economy.  They occupy  most of the  cultivated crop area.  The amount of  cultivated area for crops in Korea from the  most to the least in order of  importance is: vegetables, fruit  crops, special crops including oil crops and  flowering plants.  For this reason, the  economic  weight of the seed industry for each crop is proportional to the  amount  of each crops' cultivated area.  ( If the answer is  yes to my above  purple question. )
 
The Korean  government has  distributed the certified seed of food crops since  1974, but [ take out the]private companies have produced and sold seeds [of ] for other crops such as vegetables crops, [ take out and] fruit crops,  etc. to farmers. Of  course, the[y] private companies import and sell these seeds directly to farmers,  judging that  they can make a profit. [money by doing  that.]
Th[ese]is phenomena shall [be]continue[d] from now on, and the  role of private company[y] ies will  get larger and larger (Suggestion take out get  larger and larger  and use steadily increase ) in the Korean seed  industry.
 
The Korean  government  has distributed certified seed for food crops since  1974, but private companies  have produced and sold seeds for other  crops such as vegetables crops, fruit  crops, etc.  Of course, the private  companies import and sell  these seeds directly to farmers, believing they can  make a profit.
Th[ese]is phenomena  shall [be]continue[d] from  now on, and the role of private company[y] ies will get larger and  larger (Suggestion take out get larger and larger and use steadily increase ) in the Korean seed industry.
 
This  phenomena shall  continue from now on. The role of private companies  will steadily increase  in the Korean seed industry.
 
[In this book, things  about  certified seed business carried out by government shall be handled  largely  and other thing shall be touched very lightly.  ]
 
The main  focus of this  book will be the certified seed business as carried  out by the government.  Other  related subjects will be addressed  briefly.
 
1.2 Tool for developing seed  industry
Appropriate  organization and law are necessary as the tool for developing a seed industry.  [It  is]The [reason [why]the] Korean government  established The National Seed  Management Office and  set up the necessary laws & regulations  to  insure a continual development of her seed industry.  [to develop[e] continually her seed  industry.]
An appropriate  organization and law are necessary for developing a good seed  industry.  The Korean  government established The National  Seed Management Office and  set up the necessary laws & regulations to insure  a continual  development of her seed industry. 
 
1.2.1  National seed  management office
 
1.2.1.1  History
?  January  1962
The laws governing  [for] seed of  the major agricultural  crops was promulgated. Before this time, the certified  seed production  and distribution project was not carried out by Government.
?  November  1973
IBRD[What ever this abreviation is for you should spell it out the first time youuse it in a document. ] loan agreement  for the seed projects  in Korea was contracted
? November 1974
Regulations  [ take out on]  establishing [an “a” or “The” is needed here] National Seed Production and Distribution Office  was noticed[ I think you are saying here that a law or set of regulations were created ir establihed by the government.  If that is what you mean the phrase 'was noticed' will not work.  try ”were created.” ]. And  according to this regulation, The National Seed Production  and Distribution Office  (NSPDO) was set up under MAF.[ I do not know what this means if it is the abreviation for the name of a government office or agency it should be selled out the first time you use it.]
Regulations establishing The National Seed Production and Distribution Office  were enacted.” [ notice where I have added 'The' and capitalized letter of names of government agencies and oficial acts or laws.]
?  1976 - 1987 
7 branch  offices were  established. Each office had a seed processing plant,  a warehouse and  an office.
? December  1994
The NSPDO was transferred  from  The Ministry of Agriculture Forestry & Fisheries(MAFF) to The Office  of Rural  Development(ORD). It happened due to a Government structure['s]  adjustment.  [Take out But use] However, the  functions of NSPDO were not changed at all. [Either drop the word 'all'  or add the word 'at' before it.]
The NSPDO was transferred  from  The Ministry of Agriculture Forestry & Fisheries(MAFF) to The Office  of Rural  Development(ORD).  It happened due to an adjustment in our Government's structure.  However, the  functions of NSPDO were not changed at all.
?  December  1996
The Asan branch office,  the eighth office  was established.  Its size and capacity is almost two times of  other  branches. Futhermore, its facilities are [take out best] better  modernized. or use “much more modern. ”
?  January  1998
The new and  integrated seed industry [ I do not know why you are using the word integrated here.  What was ibtegrated by this new law? Did it integrate the “Major Agricultural Crops Seed Law” and “The Seed Management Law”? If so you need to say that here not qt the end of this paragraph.  ]   law came into effect. Though this law was promulgated  on December  1995 , there were [much] many difficulties in its being enforced  immediately.  [because of possibilities of ] There was much  confusion [occurrence] due to [the] great  differences [from the concerned ] between the new law and the laws it replaced.  previous laws, which are the major  agricultural  crops seed law and the seedling management law.

A new law which integrated the seed industry by combining two older laws “The Major Agricultural Crops Seed Law” and “The Seed Management Law” law came into effect.  Though this law was promulgated  on December  1995 , there were many difficulties in its being enforced  immediately.  There was much  confusion due to great  differences between the new law and the previous laws that it replaced. 

?  February  1998
National Seed  Production & Distribution  Office was renamed as The National Seed Management  Office(NSMO).   That  is why the new function of the plant variety protection right  was  added by the new law.   [ As a reader I do not understand.  This paragraph does not make sense . It says that the reason the new function of the “Plant Variety Protection Right” was added by the new law is because the office was renamed. There probably is something you meant to say here that you left out. ]
? August  2000
The National  Seed  Management Office was again returned to The Ministry of Agriculture  and  Forestry(MAF) from the Rural Development Administration (RDA).
?  June  2001
Resposibility for 3 branch offices among 8 offices were transferred  to the local government. The Pyoungtaek office was  transferred to  Kyungi province,  Jaecheon to Chungbuk, Daegawnrung to Kangwon  which  are local governments in accord[ing]ance with the policy of government structure['s]  reorganization.   Also this helped [And to] carry out the new functions such as plant  variety  protection and DUS [ You need here to spell out the names of these abreviations and put the abreviations in parenthqasees ( )] and VCU test by growing plants[,].  2 more ( or new) branch  offices of  Dongbu(East) and Seobu(West) were [newly]established.

The resposibility for 3 branch offices among 8 offices were transferred  to  local governments. The Pyoungtaek office was  transferred to  Kyungi province,  Jaecheon to Chungbuk, and Daegawnrung to Kangwon  in accordance with a policy of government structure reorganization.   Also this helped carry out new functions such as plant  variety  protection and DUS [ You need here to spell out the names of these abreviations and put the abreviations in parenthqasees ( )] and VCU test.  [These last three words don't make sense.  “by growing plants.”You must either add information to clarify wht you mean or take them out.  Perhaps they make sense if you spell out the two new functions you describe here. ]   Two more new  branch  offices a  Dongbu(East) and a Seobu(West) were established.

?  January  2002
Korea became the 50th  contracting  party of the UPOV [ Spell out what this means]  Convention on January 7, 2002 by depositing her  “Instrument of Accession” to the “1991 Act” of the convention on December  6,  2001. [ I am not certain but iI think these need to be capitalized and placed in quotaion marks.  I will try to check. 
 
1.2.1.2 Function or  mission
? NSMO operates and  builds  up an effective system of plant variety protection, with the aim  of  encouraging the development of new varieties of plants, for promoting  [ Either take out 'for' or say to promote ] [ take out the]    national and international benefit.   [So it is either (. . . plants, promoting national and international benefits. ) Or else it is( . . . plants to promote national and international benefits.
? NSMO operates and  improves  an effective system of seed businesses, with the aim of securing the  marketing of [ Takea out 'the']  high quality and certified seeds, keeping a stable food supply and [keeping  the stability of  food and] increasing farmer's incomes.
 
A. Plant variety  protection
?Handling  the  application and examination for plant variety protection (PVP).
?Carrying out DUS  test of the applied plant variety for  PVP and the comparative test of the  disputed variety.
?Examining  results of  DUS test for the registration of PVP.
?Filing  and managing  the registered varieties as plants of PVP.  [ I am not sure why you use “as plants of PVP” here. It may be correct depending on what it means. ]
?Managing  the applied  seed for PVP and NL, including seed storage.  [ I am not sure why you are using the word 'applied' here.  What is applied seed? ]
 
B.  Management of  plant variety performance
?Handling the  application  for the national list(NL).
?Carrying out  VCU(value for  cultivation and use)test of the applied variety for the  registration  of NL. VCU is tested on yield, quality, resistance against  disease-falling [ What is disease-falling ? Do you mean 'to prevent disease from falling on the plants?'  Or do you mean 'to prevent disease?'  Or do you mean something else? ] etc. through the field trial and technical analysis for at least  two years in three different areas. [ I think you want to say ( ... through field trial and . . . ) T

?Examining results of  VCU  test for the registration of NL and the applications for denomination [ What do you mean by denomination. is this a technical term in agriculture?  ]  Does it mean a name for a plant or something like that?” ]
?Handling the  notifications for selling plants including  seeds and controlling the seed  market [Add 'the' to 'seed market' if it is the purpose of the agency to have an artificiall government imposed control of 'the seed market.' If this is what you mean.]
?Filing and managing  the registered  varieties as NL. 

O.K. I have to stop here.  I have gone to a friends house and used his computer to do this work. I think the library is closeed SATURDAY AND SUNDAY SO I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO CONTINUE THIS WORK UNTIL MONDAY. I SUPPOSE IT WILL TAKE A WHILE TO DO.  I AM SENDING YOU PARTS OF IT AS I DO THEM SO YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WAIT TILL I FINISH TO SEe WHAT I am doing.  This may help you.  I will try to send you a completed version of whole document at the end.