About UCIS Hoop History
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Hi again. Here are some more paragrahphs. I will keep working on it. Your dad is welcomed to complain if he thinks I am changing the meanings of his statements. My goal here is to be sure I am using his ideas and words and expressing them so those who read it in English will understand what he meant.
Introduction
Korea is a small peninsula of about 10 million [ha.] I assume here you mean hectare, which is equal to 10,000 square meters per hectare this is acceptable and probably most correct in a scientific or technical or professional book. You might want to add here] (one hectare is equal to 2.47 U.S. acres.) or 24.7 million acres. [Or you might not want to add that. I get an idea that you got this Introduction info from a book or an on line site. It depends on who you intend to have as an audience. If it is going to be technical and scientific individuals then what you have is probably fine. ] Her total population reaches to 47.3 million. Population [intensity]I think you want density here. is very high as 4.8 people per hectare. The land [is consisted] consists of about 65% mountains, 20% cultural [? Do you mean agricultural area? Or Do you mean that there is 65% mountains where no one could possibly live and 20% inhabitable area ( places where someone could live if they wanted to) The word cultural here confuses me.) area and 15% others. Do you mean above that ‘The amount of land available for crops is limited to about 20% of the total land in Korea.” Or “Only 20% or the land mass in Korea is tillable. Tillable means ‘it can be tilled’ which means it can be farmed or ‘crops can be grown on it.’ From the next paragraph I get the idea that this is true.
[Because of these reasons, the] For these reasons high agricultural productivity is very
For these reasons high agricultural productivity is very necessary and important to meet
necessary and important [for meeting people's] to meet the nations demands for food.
[ food demand.]
the nations demands for food.
For these reasons high agricultural productivity is very necessary and important to meet the nations demands for food.
A seed is [ add ] the basis of agriculture. Therefore without a good
seed, it is difficult to expect success in agriculture. [ The issue of ‘A seed’ which can be used here or ‘Seed’ with out the indefinite article ‘A’ (The not definite (specific) article) comes up here. You May want to say] Seed is the basis of agriculture, without good seed it is difficult to expect success in agriculture. That is why most [of ]Take of out countries [have been doing their best for] are working hard[developing their] to develop their seed industry. Do you mean most of the countries in Asia, or most countries in the world or the developing world are doing their best developing their seed industry?
Seed is the basis of agriculture, without good seed it is difficult to expect success in agriculture. That is why most countries are working hard to develop their seed industry.
Or
A seed it the base of all agriculture. Without a good seed it is difficult to have successful agriculture. This is why many countries are working hard to develop good high yielding seeds.
[ Add ]The Korean government has [also] omit also here unless it refers to the idea that other countries are developing their seed production and Korea is also doing that] been driving the policies for building her seed industry such as breeding [a] take out the a new [variety,] varieties, protecting breeder's rights, supplying consumers and germplasm users [ I do not know this word or term ‘germplasm users’] Do you mean planters? As in those who plant seeds. (farmers) or do you mean something else. The word or term germplasm is not in a common English dictionary and the term germplasm users is not there either. The term ‘germ plasm’ is in the Merriam Webster’s dictionary that is the same dictionary I gave to your son as a gift. It is the best dictionary for the American English Language to use for any sort of scholarly or professional use. It is the oldest American dictionary published and has the most research to back up its words and meanings. That dictionary defines the term in relation to germ cells as in ‘genetic issues.’ It says it is part of the cells bearing the genetic information or is the hereditary material of the cells. I am supposing from this that you might be talking about supplying consumers ( meaning farmers with some sort of seed that gets them started or going in the agricultural business. Perhaps you mean something that I as a lay person (a lay person is someone who is not familiar with a particular subject or profession) would not be likely to know about. If it is a modern term in the seed industry please tell me what the term means in simple words and I will try to help you find a word in common English or a phrase that will let the readers know what you mean. with a high qualified and certified seed. [Now I am thinking that germplasm means farmers. ]
Among these policies and situations, this book is focused on production and distribution of 5 major crops' seed in Korea. [ Crops’ with the apostrophe the ‘ at the end means possessive that the seed belongs to or comes form the crops With the word crop referring to more than one crop. This is correct here since there are 5 crops being spoken of. I am not certain but I think you want the phrase ‘ seed crops’ here. I will research this and let you know. Do you mean crops that are raised especially to make seeds from?] The5 major food crops are rice, barley, soybean, corn(maize) and potato. Among these crops, rice [occupies] comprises or makes up about 90% of total production amounts of food crops. The average annual production of rice reaches to 6 million MT. [ I do not know the abbreviation MT. ]
The yield of rice per ha is about 5MT. It is, I think, a very high yield. This high yield per unit area is due to: [increments of or better] increase in the distributed amounts [better yet] increase inthe distribution of a high qualified-certified seed, development & spread of cultivation technology and better irrigation/drainage facilities of paddy field. [Because I am not familiar with this industry, I am not sure, but it seams to me this should say] paddy fields. [However, it may be the case that the use of the singular term here is acceptable. It may be a tradition in this industry to refer to this in the singular in a discussion such as this. ][The] take out the word The and the s’ at the end of crops’ and capitalize Crop crops' cultivation such as sowing, planting, weeding and harvesting is almost [ add ] all done by a machine. Crop cultivation activity such as sowing, planting, weeding and harvesting is almost all done by a machine.
As shown in the or by the above table, the cultivated area [ of]for each of our 5 major crops trends to decrease [, on contrast,] while yield per unit area trends to increase or maintain [take out the]a similar level. [Specially] Especially theor Specifically theyield per unit of rice and potato [on] in 2003 was increased [take out around] from 160 to [Take out and ]200% each, compared with that o[n] f {you should have in 1980. or of 1980.] 1980.
As shown by the above table, the cultivated area for each of our 5 major crops trends to decrease over time while yield per unit area trends to increase or maintain a similar level. Specifically, the yield per unit of rice and potato in 2003 was increased from 160 to 200% each, compared with that of 1980.
The certified seed production and distribution activity, I think, has played an important role [for an increment of the] in increasing agricultural productivity.
In addition to food crops, [the crops of] vegetable[s] and fruit[s]corps are important in view of our national economy. They[and] occupy most of the cultivated crop area [of crops ] as a matter of fact. The amount of cultivated area [of]for crops in Korea is from largest in order of vegetables, fruit crops, special crops including oil crops and flowering plants. ([Because of] For this reason, the economic weight of the seed industry by crops is great in order of the similar as order of crops' cultivated area. I am not sure what you are trying to say here. Are you saying? The importance given to improving vegetable seeds by the government and seed industry is more than the importance given to improving flowering plants seeds because more acres are planted with vegetables than are planted with flowering seeds? Is that what you are saying or mean? )
In addition to food crops, vegetable and fruit corps are important in view of our national economy. They occupy most of the cultivated crop area. The amount of cultivated area for crops in Korea from the most to the least in order of importance is: vegetables, fruit crops, special crops including oil crops and flowering plants. For this reason, the economic weight of the seed industry for each crop is proportional to the amount of each crops' cultivated area. ( If the answer is yes to my above purple question. )
The Korean government has distributed the certified seed of food crops since 1974, but [ take out the]private companies have produced and sold seeds [of ] for other crops such as vegetables crops, [ take out and] fruit crops, etc. to farmers. Of course, the[y] private companies import and sell these seeds directly to farmers, judging that they can make a profit. [money by doing that.]
Th[ese]is phenomena shall [be]continue[d] from now on, and the role of private company[y] ies will get larger and larger (Suggestion take out get larger and larger and use steadily increase ) in the Korean seed industry.
The Korean government has distributed certified seed for food crops since 1974, but private companies have produced and sold seeds for other crops such as vegetables crops, fruit crops, etc. Of course, the private companies import and sell these seeds directly to farmers, believing they can make a profit.
Th[ese]is phenomena shall [be]continue[d] from now on, and the role of private company[y] ies will get larger and larger (Suggestion take out get larger and larger and use steadily increase ) in the Korean seed industry.
This phenomena shall continue from now on. The role of private companies will steadily increase in the Korean seed industry.
[In this book, things about certified seed business carried out by government shall be handled largely and other thing shall be touched very lightly. ]
The main focus of this book will be the certified seed business as carried out by the government. Other related subjects will be addressed briefly.
1.2 Tool for developing seed industry
Appropriate organization and law are necessary as the tool for developing a seed industry. [It is]The [reason [why]the] Korean government established The National Seed Management Office and set up the necessary laws & regulations to insure a continual development of her seed industry. [to develop[e] continually her seed industry.]
An appropriate organization and law are necessary for developing a good seed industry. The Korean government established The National Seed Management Office and set up the necessary laws & regulations to insure a continual development of her seed industry.
1.2.1 National seed management office
1.2.1.1 History
? January 1962
The laws governing [for] seed of the major agricultural crops was promulgated. Before this time, the certified seed production and distribution project was not carried out by Government.
? November 1973
IBRD[What ever this abreviation is for you should spell it out the first time youuse it in a document. ] loan agreement for the seed projects in Korea was contracted
? November 1974
Regulations [ take out on] establishing [an “a” or “The” is needed here] National Seed Production and Distribution Office was noticed[ I think you are saying here that a law or set of regulations were created ir establihed by the government. If that is what you mean the phrase 'was noticed' will not work. try ”were created.” ]. And according to this regulation, The National Seed Production and Distribution Office (NSPDO) was set up under MAF.[ I do not know what this means if it is the abreviation for the name of a government office or agency it should be selled out the first time you use it.]
Regulations establishing The National Seed Production and Distribution Office were enacted.” [ notice where I have added 'The' and capitalized letter of names of government agencies and oficial acts or laws.]
? 1976 - 1987
7 branch offices were established. Each office had a seed processing plant, a warehouse and an office.
? December 1994
The NSPDO was transferred from The Ministry of Agriculture Forestry & Fisheries(MAFF) to The Office of Rural Development(ORD). It happened due to a Government structure['s] adjustment. [Take out But use] However, the functions of NSPDO were not changed at all. [Either drop the word 'all' or add the word 'at' before it.]
The NSPDO was transferred from The Ministry of Agriculture Forestry & Fisheries(MAFF) to The Office of Rural Development(ORD). It happened due to an adjustment in our Government's structure. However, the functions of NSPDO were not changed at all.
? December 1996
The Asan branch office, the eighth office was established. Its size and capacity is almost two times of other branches. Futhermore, its facilities are [take out best] better modernized. or use “much more modern. ”
? January 1998
The new and integrated seed industry [ I do not know why you are using the word integrated here. What was ibtegrated by this new law? Did it integrate the “Major Agricultural Crops Seed Law” and “The Seed Management Law”? If so you need to say that here not qt the end of this paragraph. ] law came into effect. Though this law was promulgated on December 1995 , there were [much] many difficulties in its being enforced immediately. [because of possibilities of ] There was much confusion [occurrence] due to [the] great differences [from the concerned ] between the new law and the laws it replaced. previous laws, which are the major agricultural crops seed law and the seedling management law.
A new law which integrated the seed industry by combining two older laws “The Major Agricultural Crops Seed Law” and “The Seed Management Law” law came into effect. Though this law was promulgated on December 1995 , there were many difficulties in its being enforced immediately. There was much confusion due to great differences between the new law and the previous laws that it replaced.
? February 1998
National Seed Production & Distribution Office was renamed as The National Seed Management Office(NSMO). That is why the new function of the plant variety protection right was added by the new law. [ As a reader I do not understand. This paragraph does not make sense . It says that the reason the new function of the “Plant Variety Protection Right” was added by the new law is because the office was renamed. There probably is something you meant to say here that you left out. ]
? August 2000
The National Seed Management Office was again returned to The Ministry of Agriculture and Forestry(MAF) from the Rural Development Administration (RDA).
? June 2001
Resposibility for 3 branch offices among 8 offices were transferred to the local government. The Pyoungtaek office was transferred to Kyungi province, Jaecheon to Chungbuk, Daegawnrung to Kangwon which are local governments in accord[ing]ance with the policy of government structure['s] reorganization. Also this helped [And to] carry out the new functions such as plant variety protection and DUS [ You need here to spell out the names of these abreviations and put the abreviations in parenthqasees ( )] and VCU test by growing plants[,]. 2 more ( or new) branch offices of Dongbu(East) and Seobu(West) were [newly]established.
The resposibility for 3 branch offices among 8 offices were transferred to local governments. The Pyoungtaek office was transferred to Kyungi province, Jaecheon to Chungbuk, and Daegawnrung to Kangwon in accordance with a policy of government structure reorganization. Also this helped carry out new functions such as plant variety protection and DUS [ You need here to spell out the names of these abreviations and put the abreviations in parenthqasees ( )] and VCU test. [These last three words don't make sense. “by growing plants.”You must either add information to clarify wht you mean or take them out. Perhaps they make sense if you spell out the two new functions you describe here. ] Two more new branch offices a Dongbu(East) and a Seobu(West) were established.
? January 2002
Korea became the 50th contracting party of the UPOV [ Spell out what this means] Convention on January 7, 2002 by depositing her “Instrument of Accession” to the “1991 Act” of the convention on December 6, 2001. [ I am not certain but iI think these need to be capitalized and placed in quotaion marks. I will try to check.
1.2.1.2 Function or mission
? NSMO operates and builds up an effective system of plant variety protection, with the aim of encouraging the development of new varieties of plants, for promoting [ Either take out 'for' or say to promote ] [ take out the] national and international benefit. [So it is either (. . . plants, promoting national and international benefits. ) Or else it is( . . . plants to promote national and international benefits.
? NSMO operates and improves an effective system of seed businesses, with the aim of securing the marketing of [ Takea out 'the'] high quality and certified seeds, keeping a stable food supply and [keeping the stability of food and] increasing farmer's incomes.
A. Plant variety protection
?Handling the application and examination for plant variety protection (PVP).
?Carrying out DUS test of the applied plant variety for PVP and the comparative test of the disputed variety.
?Examining results of DUS test for the registration of PVP.
?Filing and managing the registered varieties as plants of PVP. [ I am not sure why you use “as plants of PVP” here. It may be correct depending on what it means. ]
?Managing the applied seed for PVP and NL, including seed storage. [ I am not sure why you are using the word 'applied' here. What is applied seed? ]
B. Management of plant variety performance
?Handling the application for the national list(NL).
?Carrying out VCU(value for cultivation and use)test of the applied variety for the registration of NL. VCU is tested on yield, quality, resistance against disease-falling [ What is disease-falling ? Do you mean 'to prevent disease from falling on the plants?' Or do you mean 'to prevent disease?' Or do you mean something else? ] etc. through the field trial and technical analysis for at least two years in three different areas. [ I think you want to say ( ... through field trial and . . . ) T
?Examining results of VCU test for the registration of NL and the applications for denomination [ What do you mean by denomination. is this a technical term in agriculture? ] Does it mean a name for a plant or something like that?” ]
?Handling the notifications for selling plants including seeds and controlling the seed market [Add 'the' to 'seed market' if it is the purpose of the agency to have an artificiall government imposed control of 'the seed market.' If this is what you mean.]
?Filing and managing the registered varieties as NL.
O.K. I have to stop here. I have gone to a friends house and used his computer to do this work. I think the library is closeed SATURDAY AND SUNDAY SO I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO CONTINUE THIS WORK UNTIL MONDAY. I SUPPOSE IT WILL TAKE A WHILE TO DO. I AM SENDING YOU PARTS OF IT AS I DO THEM SO YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WAIT TILL I FINISH TO SEe WHAT I am doing. This may help you. I will try to send you a completed version of whole document at the end.